Marni Advice Monday: Cat’s Got My Tongue.

Hey everyone,

My housemate’s cat passed away a few days ago and…I miss him. Hamlet was a devoted feline companion with a low rumbling purr and a weakness for belly rubs. I didn’t live with him long, only a handful of months–but he made an impression.

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And not just because he drooled on everything in my room.

Hamlet loved everyone. He was an incredible listener with a fondness for lazy afternoon snoozes and quiet evenings spent curled up on the sofa. He wasn’t crazy about my taste in music, or my tendency to dance around the room when he least expected it. Still, he accepted me as another one of his loyal human subjects with only a handful of reproachful meows.

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Worship me, Human! Earn your keep!

So here is my advice for today: Pet a cat. Hug a dog. Snuggle with a parakeet.

If you’ve got a snake…um, GET RID OF IT!

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They are the worst.

Nothing beats unconditional love. I consider myself incredibly lucky to have found that with Hamlet, even if it didn’t last nearly long enough. I hope you have some of that in your life, too! Oh, and I still recommend those lazy afternoon naps…

*Crawls back under the covers*

Awkwardly yours,

Marni

Portland, You’ve Got Marni!

Hey everyone,

I realized that I haven’t shared much about my awesome new home in Portland with you! All you got to see was nostalgic-Thanksgiving-Marni. And she’s not all that much fun. Trust me.

So let me fill you guys in!

My second day in Portland was spent with a whole bunch of my friends in Ikea.

I’m so lucky that they agreed to help me because Ikea has to be the most overwhelming place in the history of overwhelming places! My friends were like, “What kind of a bed are you looking for, Marni?”

To which I brilliantly replied: “Y’know…the kind that holds a mattress? And sheets? I’m quite fond of those!”

They were the ones who instructed me to try out all the mattresses on my stomach…

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Because that’s how I roll. Or, y’know…sleep.

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And they only mocked me a little for taking off my shoes in the store. I thought it was the polite thing to do when testing a mattress!

Somehow we managed to make it out of Ikea in time to make an afternoon showing of the Hunger Games. I thought the movie was absolutely great. Seriously. If you haven’t seen it, you totally should! Although I will admit that during this scene…

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All I could think was, “I’ve been in that elevator! It’s the same hotel I stayed in for the RWA conference in Atlanta! That stupid elevator nearly made me seasick too!”

So that was a little distracting for me.

Anyhow, the next morning I had a battle of my own to wage. Marni vs. The Ikea Bed.

It was a long painful struggle, but I’m proud to say that I put the whole thing together all by myself! And there is only one loose screw in the entire thing! 

Now if you’re thinking, “Marni, that’s not a big deal. All you had to do was follow directions!” well, yes. It is that simple. I just happen to hate following instructions. It’s partly why I’m a terrible cook. I glance at recipes and growl, “You’re not the boss of me!

So for me to successfully decipher the bizarre Ikea instructions was nothing short of miraculous.

Here is what my room looks like now:

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Have I mentioned that I love twinkle lights? Because I do. More than just about anything.

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I was so cold when I first arrived in Portland that I tried to insulate my room by putting a layer of clear plastic on my window. I don’t think it helped keep the heat in, but it’s now a great place to brainstorm ideas!

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This is Monsieur Mustachio! I can tell whether or not my heater is on by glancing at his magnificent facial hair. 

I’m still trying to get a lay of the land. I’m plotting new bus routes and testing out coffee shops. But this place really does feel like home. It helps that my housemates are completely made of awesome–especially the furry one!

This is Hamlet!

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He is a total sweetheart. But he also has some very strong opinions about petting time, so…sdjlhgkergvwgnwwwwrtu

I better appease the prince!

Awkwardly yours,

~Marni