I couldn’t resist.
This might be the hardest part of my job! So help an author out? Tell your friends that they should read Awkward (available on Amazon for a limited time at the low price of $2.99) and preorder Invisible!
You can purchase it right here!
Sincerely,
Marni
Hey everyone!
So a bunch of you awesome people have wanted me to sign your books. Just for the record: I totally want to do it for you! I even got a PO Box to make it possible!
The logistics involved are definitely daunting though. You have to send a copy to my PO address and then I have to ship it back…
And the last time I sent a package through the US postal service it reached the intended destination…three months after her birthday.
Good thing there weren’t cookies in there. That’s all I’m saying.
So yesterday in order to fix this problem, I knowingly journeyed somewhere that makes me lose my mind. Seriously. The last time I went there four of my friends had to forcibly remove me from the premises.
I know it’s ridiculous, but I instantly morph into a preschooler when I’m at Sticker Planet. And the one thought running through my mind becomes: MINE! ALL THESE STICKERS MUST BE MIIIINE!!!!
That’s when my friends usually try to remind me that I need to save my money for the Romance Writers of America Conference in Atlanta (SQUEE!!!! I can’t wait!) and that I don’t actually need fifteen packages of stickers.
And then I remember that since these stickers are obviously an essential part of my writing process, they are technically tax deductible.
Fake moustache stickers: $5
These expressions: priceless.
The cashiers were like, “Um…do you want to join our valued customer program or something?”
And I said, “HAHAHA…NO! Are you kidding me? Do you have any idea how dangerous that would be?!”
That’s when they traded looks and edged further away from the crazy girl who thinks the words “stickers” and “dangerous” belong in the same sentence.
But c’mon…how great is this:
It’s Jane! And no, sadly, my video trailer will not include all these awesome stickers. But a future one totally will!
And who will look ridiculous then, I ask you?!
Okay, probably still me.
But I did it all so that I could buy these fun labels for you guys!
This way you can have an autographed copy of my books without a logistical nightmare. If you want me to send you one (or more!) I just need you to follow a very simple procedure:
1. Email me at MarniRBates@gmail.com or send me a letter addressed like this:
Marni Bates
PO Box 415
Los Angeles, CA 90078
I know it can be scary sending an email to a stranger with your address in it, so I totally understand if you’d prefer to go by mail. The important thing is that I get an address to send it to!
2. Write your name clearly so that I can personalize it for you.
3. If you don’t want me to address it to you, let me know! I can just sign my name if you’d rather have me do that.
4. Wait for me to send it to you!
That’s it! That simple. And this offer totally applies to my friends outside the US too! *Waves enthusiastically to all my awesome fans in Hungary and Brazil*
And now I better start packing! I’m going home tomorrow so that I can give my mom a big ol’ hug on Mother’s Day.
But there will still be a vlog post on Sunday and Monday (probably), so stay tuned!
~Marni
Hey everyone!
Okay, so recently I was asked if anything surprised me about life as a writer. And the more I thought about it, the more I realized that I did start my career with some major misconceptions.
I remember thinking that authors must love it when reviewers bring up really insightful critiques of their work. That they would prefer a well-thought out 3.5 star review to an inaccurate 5 star one.
We don’t. We just want you to love us whole-heartedly.
Are we ridiculous for wanting unconditional praise? Yes. Absolutely.
But this is totally how we behave whenever we read the zinger in an otherwise awesome review.
I also thought that being published would in some way reduce my writing-related freakouts…and it hasn’t. When my characters are giving me trouble and I know I have to edit out all my Navy SEALs but I don’t want to lose them, it still feels something like this:
Okay, I’m not that bad. Usually.
There are also a number of lifestyle things I didn’t expect to change for me. For starters this looks like a perfectly reasonable purchase to me now.
I hear you, Mindy. I would so be all over that.
And this is something I would definitely say to my bestie while I complain about going to the post office…
Then she would totally look at me in disgust and say:
It’s good to have people who keep you grounded.
I also never expected to be this tied into social media.
An overreaction or…a perfectly reasonable response? You decide. I can’t.
Last but certainly not least, I thought the process of being published would generally make me cooler/less awkward. But as you can see…
Although for me it will always be pictures of ducklings and baby tigers. I just turn to mush.
I hope this post doesn’t sound negative because there are also so many wonderful things I never saw coming! Y’know, like having Disney interested in turning my debut novel into a made-for-TV movie. And because I have such amazing readers…I am getting a P.O. box so that I can sign anything you want me to (within reason, people!).
Just as soon as I get dressed…
Now some of you have requested that I send you some book-related swag, but I don’t have any. Seriously. I don’t have bookmarks or stickers or anything remotely cool that I think you would want. The closest I come is about a hundred or so coverflats of the Magical Mayhem Anthology:
So if anyone wants me to sign that and send it to them, I can do it! Otherwise, I’m a little stuck in terms of how to increase my levels of swag. If I bought white labels and signed them would you guys like that? I could even try to buy sparkly stickers to give it a little something extra if you want! Maybe some unicorns…
Or not!
If any of you have suggestions for swag, I’d love to hear your ideas!
Hopefully, that way it will feel something like this…
…without breaking my budget.
But my original point (I swear, I did have one) is that I had a lot of misconceptions about the writing world when I started out. And I think my most off-base notion was that for some people this is easy. They make it look so effortless! They juggle author obligations with full-time jobs/part-time jobs/diaper changes/child-care/political and social activism, and so much more. Here is the kicker: they do all of it really well.
It is both awe-inspiring and intimidating.
Especially since most days I feel like I really accomplished something if I blog.
The truth is that those authors are sweating through their stories just like we are, even if it sometimes feels like they do this:
…while we do this:
Now I’m off to the post office!
For real this time…
~Marni
Hey everyone!
The spin-off sequel to Awkward comes out on Tuesday, September 25th.
Also known as this Tuesday! Also known as tomorrow!
*flails arms in excitement*
It doesn’t feel real yet.
In fact, it feels decidedly unreal. And I know I should be more familiar with the concept by this point. I wrote a book, sent it to my editor, banged my head against a wall a few thousand times and voila! It hits the shelves!
(Not an accurate depiction of the writing/publishing process. Obviously. Since I left out roasting marshmallows over candles at 2am when I get stuck. Oh, and my unbelievably awesome support group. Y’all know how much I depend on you!)
But it still amazes me to think of my book, sitting on bookshelves, waiting for super awesome people to read it!
Especially because this book holds a very special place in my heart. Which is not to say that I love my other books less (Oh wow, I have a whole lot more sympathy for my mom now. Having her children demand to know which one of us she would save from a burning house first must have been obnoxious. Hint: it would be me) but this one is extra special.
So I’m giving a behind-the-scenes sneak peek:
I was packing for my flight back to Oregon after spending the past three weeks in my cousin’s little apartment near Rice University in Houston, Texas–when I got The Call.
Marni doesn’t quite know how to blend in Texas.
Honestly, if I was in the middle of a mugging and my super agent Laurie McLean rang me up, I’d probably give the muggers the can you hold this for a moment finger and answer the phone.
Um, I think it’s pretty obvious from the photo why I believe she has super powers…
As it was, this particular situation was a lot less dramatic. Even if I did suspect that the humidity in Houston was trying to smother me.
“Hi Marni, I just got a call from KTeen” SuperAgent Laurie said and I instantly brace myself for the news that every copy of Awkward has been destroyed in a freak natural disaster.
“Uh huh…”
“They want to know if you would be willing to write a spin-off holiday novella.”
At this point in the conversation, I distinctly remember happy dancing like a demented chicken and squawking, “YES! Yes! I’ve never written a novella before but I am in!”
“Great. I will email you everything they just sent me and then . . . oh hang on. They want a spin-off novel.”
The demented chicken dance stopped. Probably because it felt like my heart was no longer functioning properly and all that blood was going straight to my head.
“Uh . . . wow! Okay. I mean . . . wow. I can do that. I’ll just set it after Invisible and then–”
“Actually, they want it released between Awkward and Invisible.”
This is when I started pressing buttons on my phone, convinced that I had misheard her and that my crappy cell phone was to blame.
“But I’ve already written Invisible,” I blurted out.
I could practically feel Laurie smiling patiently on the other side of the phone. “I know. That’s why they want this to be a spin-off.”
“Right. Spin-off.” I mumbled. “Um . . . who do you think I should . . . spin . . . off?”
“It could be anyone.” Laurie pointed out. “Maybe one of the rockstars?”
“But they’re guys!”
Laurie waited patiently for me to make my point.
“I’ve never written from a male point of view before! I definitely can’t write a whole novel that way!”
“It’s just an idea, Marni. I’m sure you’ll figure it out.”
One of my SuperAgent’s most impressive powers is the ability to make me believe that I can do anything. I don’t know how she pulls it off, but when I’m on the phone with her I am willing to agree to just about anything.
And four minutes later I was calling my mom and freaking out.
“I don’t know what I just agreed to do!” I confessed sheepishly. “They asked the Jewish girl to write a holiday novel?! Do you think I should tell them this? Because I refuse to write a Christmas miracle. And no way is Hanukkah Harry coming down a chimney to save the day! Do you hear me, Mom? THERE WILL BE NO HANUKKAH HARRY!“
I made this point–rather loudly, I admit–in the airport and found myself on the receiving end of a more than a few funny looks.
Looking back, I’m just lucky that airport security didn’t consider this un-American sentiment and try to interrogate me about it.
Okay, I’m lucky for a whole host of reasons. I’m eternally grateful to KTeen for allowing me to write Decked with Holly the way I felt the story needed to be told: with two alternating point of views and no Hanukkah Harrys.
And to my SuperAgent, friends and family members who tolerated my Christmas in July tactic.
A special shout-out to my mom who must have stumbled upon me listening to the Pomplamoose version of Always in the Season three hundred times.
This book may have scared me at first but it was an absolute pleasure to write.
I fell completely in love with a certain rockstar drummer and enjoyed every second I spent in his head. I don’t want to spoil the ending but he does something that made me go all melty inside.
I want to discuss it with people soo badly!
So if you want to buy a copy of Decked with Holly you can do so quite easily here:
And if you also want to click the “like” button, I know for a fact that the author will do a demented chicken dance.
You also might want to read Awkward (if you haven’t already) because it will make Decked with Holly even more exciting for you. That said, I promise you don’t have to read Awkward to completely understand what is happening to Holly and Nick.
Then again, with the awesome discount price of $2.99 for Awkward now is a really good time to get it.
Awkward is clearly still on my mind…
Anyhow, once you read the books I sincerely hope you will tweet me with your thoughts. I absolutely love hearing from people! Oh, and whenever I get fan art I call up every single member of my family and I brag about it to them.
One time someone messaged me that I was tied as her favorite with Justin Bieber and I geeked out.
Watch out, Biebs. I’m stealing your fan base!
My point is that I really do love to hear from you so I hope you’ll consider tweeting me at:
Or you can message me using my Facebook fan page:
I will absolutely see your messages in these places!
And if you feel like leaving comments on Goodreads, I probably will be too confused to respond but I will do my happy dance.
I have even bigger news coming your way soon so . . . I should probably stop writing before I give it all away.
Sincerely,
Marni
Marni Bates 